Moving mayhem

Moving house is right up there as one of life’s major events, considered by some as causing stress similar to that of a marriage breakdown, losing your job or losing a loved one. For someone who, at last count, has moved 15 times over the years, I concur wholeheartedly!

Regardless of whether you are heading to a larger or smaller house, or perhaps to a retirement village or assisted living, moving means change which can be unsettling. Emotionally it tugs at the heartstrings and physically it is an exhausting process that lasts for weeks and sometimes months.

When I stopped to assess my various moves over the decades, I realised that in my early years I didn’t even blink an eye when the offer to relocate to a different share house or flat came my way. I found it exciting to be in a new environment and packing up a couple of pot plants, kitchen items, clothes and a bed was no big deal.

However, fast forward a decade and moving became way more complicated and involved. Marriage and children meant there was so much ‘stuff’ to move each time – and more emotional baggage was left behind. It seemed that no matter how well you planned, moving was always a highly stressful event.

One of our biggest – and definitely most emotionally and physically draining moves – was when our family of six from Australia to the US.

Fortunately, the number of items allowed to be shipped was minimal but there was the associated stress of deciding what and what couldn’t go. Which toys would make the cut and did we really need to take those golf sticks? On top of that we had to store our existing furniture and belongings, hold the obligatory garage sale to get rid of unwanted items (sadly, including a crate of LPs which sold for $5!), and sorting visas also became a nightmare. The seemingly endless teary goodbyes to friends and family meant we were emotionally spent by the time we sat on the plane. 

On the flip side, while we were excited to explore our new location, it was quite stressful lobbing in a country where you knew no-one, trying to find accommodation, sourcing schools for children, and starting to build a network of new friends.

Upon returning to Australia, we were determined to stay put for a while and managed a good 11-year stint before our last move. By then we were in a different stage of life as children were leaving home and we needed less space. Nonetheless, it was difficult to say goodbye to a home that harboured so many memories. It was a space where we had celebrated significant events in our lives, held parties to celebrate major birthday milestones, and generally enjoyed living day to day.

As you can imagine, the actual moving day was a teary occasion, no doubt compounded by the stress of cleaning each room as it was emptied and the need to hand over keys at a certain time.

(Note to self: if in any way you can avoid it, don’t try and leave one home and move into the next one on the same day. Not only is it stressful having to work to a strict deadline, but there are inevitably unforeseen issues that arise on the day.)

For example, who knew our beautiful buffet that stood so grand and tall in our cellar would present such a challenge to four sturdy removalists (who were employed to move the heavy items)? What should have been an easy task became an hour-long logistical nightmare – time we really didn’t have to spare. And then there was the pipe in the laundry that decided to spring a leak when the washing machine exited stage left. Luckily a friend’s father was a plumber who came to the rescue.

We’ve all been there and have stories to tell of things that went wrong on moving day. Luckily, the experts – removalists who deal with this daily and psychologists who sometimes tend to the aftermath – have some tips that may help next time you are moving out.  

While it may seem obvious, they suggest many issues can be avoided if you plan ahead and start the process of packing up the house as early as possible. The more organised you can be, the better. Look around and see what items you won’t need in the short term, such as out-of-season clothing, books, photographs and kitchen items, and get them packed away early on.

Sort out the administrative tasks well before your moving date. Ensure utilities like gas, water and electricity will be available when you take over your new home. No-one wants to spend the first night in the darkness!

Don’t try and do it all by yourself. If possible, call in the help of friends or family. If finances permit, consider using a professional removalist who can take out the physical strain of a move. Be prepared for the unexpected. No matter how well you plan, you are likely to be thrown a curve ball at some stage of the process. 

Above all else, be kind to yourself. Recognise that moving house is hard. It’s totally normal to have feelings of loss and sadness as you leave a familiar space that holds special memories, not to mention the people and places that have been part of your nearby world. Accept that at times in the process you will feel tired and emotional.

Ultimately, keep in mind why you are moving and embrace your new location. Consider it a fresh start and try to stay positive. Focus on the good aspects of your new home and take time to explore your new surroundings.

Happy packing!

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