As soon as she had finished high school, Mary from Dublin shook the Irish dust off her shoes and made her way to London’s West End where she lived her dream and became a successful show business performer.

Several years later she returned to her hometown for a holiday. While back in the country she thought she should go to confession as it had been some time since her last visit.

Mary went to the church she had attended as a child and entered the confessional where she recognised Father Bill’s voice, the long-time parish priest. Mary explained she was an acrobatic dancer and was knocking them dead in London.

Father Bill wanted to know what Mary meant exactly so she said she would be happy to demonstrate what she did on stage. She stepped out of the confessional and with the elderly priest watching, she did a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings and backflips.

Kneeling in one of the church pews and waiting their turn were two older ladies. Watching the young girl’s acrobatics with wide eyes, one said to the other, “Goodness, will you look at the penance Old Father Bill is givin’ out. And me, with my bloomers on!”

My dad was bragging about his new hearing aid.

“State of the Art,” he said, “It cost me a fortune.”

Impressed, I asked: “Awesome what type is it? “

He said: “Two thirty.”

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