Families on Holidays!!!!

Dad insisted we leave at 5am to beat the traffic. We did. Unfortunately, our luggage didn’t leave until Mum went back for it.

Our family has two holiday budgets: the one we agree on before we leave, and the one we agree never to discuss when we get home.

“‘Are we there yet?” the kids asked.
“Only another three hours,” I said.
My wife looked at me. “We’re still in the driveway.”
“I’m including the argument about what we’ve forgotten.”

We rented a holiday house advertised as “a stone’s throw from the beach”. Having walked there, I’d like to meet whoever threw that stone.

I asked the teenager what she liked best about our camping holiday.
“The photos.”
“You haven’t taken any.”
“No, the ones of the hotel we’re staying in next time.”

Our holiday house sleeps eight comfortably. There are only six of us, but three have been assigned the sofa because apparently snoring counts as extra guests.

Dad spent twenty minutes reversing the caravan while Mum gave directions. They’re now communicating through the children.

We told the kids our holiday accommodation had no Wi-Fi.
They stared at us. For a moment, we thought we’d finally made eye contact. Then we realised they were checking whether we were serious.

Dad said the six-hour drive was “half the fun”.
The kids immediately voted to cancel the other half.

The brochure promised a holiday we’d never forget. The credit card statement arrives monthly to make sure.

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