Jokes

Angelina Lupo decided to visit the gravesite of her late husband, Vincent, after Mass. Her retired criminal husband had been dead just one month, so Angelina thought it was time to say a prayer at his gravesite. But when Angelina arrived at the cemetery, she couldn’t find her hubby’s resting place.

Finally, she came across a grounds keeper who ushered her into a small room where the records were kept.  Poring over maps and lists of the deceased, he turned to the widow and said, “I can’t find any record of a Vincent Lupo buried here. The closest I can find is an Angelina Lupo.”

“That’s him,” she cried. “He always put everything in my name.”

It was the young deacon’s first homily after ordination, and he was very nervous. Halfway through his homily at Mass one Sunday he noticed that members of the congregation were fidgety and not paying attention. He stopped speaking and asked, “Can you hear me at the back?”

A parishioner sitting in the back pew replied, “Not really!”

Before he could re-start his homily, people in the front pews stood up and moved to the back of the church.

Courtesy the Book of Catholic Jokes by Deacon Tom Sheridan

Have a joke to share?  Send it to editor@majellan.org.au 

New Ebook 75 YEARS OF LAUGHS FROM THE MAJELLAN MAGAZINE

Available now!

Past Collections

Jokes 1/09

Jokes We can’t let Father’s Day go by without a dad joke … (and a bad one at that!)     Dad decides it’s time

Read More »

Jokes 27/08

Jokes It’s the first warm weekend of spring, and all the neighbours suddenly forget how to behave outdoors. The joggers come out like they’ve been

Read More »

Jokes 20/08

Jokes A woman awoke excitedly on her birthday and announced enthusiastically to her husband, “I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for

Read More »