A man asked his wife one morning why she kept staring out of their loungeroom window.

Taking a deep breath, she replied, “I’m really fed up with the state of Mrs Brown’s blinds. Mrs Perkins’ are not much better. And that Mrs Lewis – honestly! Look at her blinds. They are filthy. They’re just not house proud like me. Dirty blinds are such an eyesore, don’t you think? If you were a really good husband, you’d get them to do something about their blinds. In fact, I wish you would. I can’t stand it.”

“I’ll tell you what,” her husband said as he peered through the window beside her, “I’ll see what I can do.”

The following morning, she approached her husband, smiling broadly.

“I can’t believe it. The neighbour’s blinds. They are immaculate. What did you say to those women?”

“Nothing,” he told her, “I just cleaned our window.”

A girl asks a boy: “Peter, how much do you love me?”

The boy looks her in the eyes, “Look up at the stars, that’s how much I love you.”

The girl is confused, “But it’s morning, there are no stars?”

Boy nods, “Exactly!”

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