Jokes What do you call a fire that tells secrets? A flameboyant! Why did the fire go to the party alone? It didn’t have a match! What do you call a fire that loves to dance? A disco inferno! What did the fire say to the marshmallow? “Stop playing with me, you’re […]
Jokes A husband and wife who work for the circus go to an adoption agency looking to adopt a child, but the social workers have doubts about their suitability. So the couple produce photos of their 25-metre motorhome, which is clean and well maintained and equipped with a beautiful nursery. The social workers are
Jokes Because we love our mothers so much, here are some one-liners to make her smile, laugh and hopefully not cry! I asked my mum what she wanted for Mother’s Day. She said, “Nothing would make me happier than a clean house.” So, I got her exactly what she asked for… absolutely nothing. Consistency
Jokes Ever since Austin was a child, he had a fear someone or something was lurking under his bed at night. So, he finally went to a psychiatrist and told him about his problem. “Every time I go to bed I think there’s somebody under it,” Austin explained. “I’m scared. I think I’m
Jokes A woman is walking through the park when she sees an attractive man sitting on a bench. He’s reading a book and eating fruit. Slowly, the woman gathers courage to go ask him out. She walks over, takes a seat next to him, and says, “Sorry to bother you. I know this may be
Jokes Because today is International Wellness Day … Why is it so hard to trust atoms? Because they make everything up! I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. Now she looks surprised. What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick. What do you call a fake noodle going to a spa? An
Jokes Life’s short. Smile while you still have teeth. I need a six-month vacation, twice a year. I tried cooking something from scratch once. The fire department wasn’t impressed. You know you’re getting old when your back goes out more than you do. If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving
Jokes It’s April Fool’s Day so let’s celebrate … Did you hear about the goats that got in trouble for playing pranks on April Fools’? It turned out to be a couple of kids. Two guys walk into a bar on April Fools’ Day. The third one ducked. I told a chemistry
Jokes What did one plate say to the other plate?“Dinner’s on me.” What do you call a lazy kangaroo?A pouch potato. Why did the student eat his homework?Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake. Why did the car get a flat tyre? Because there was a fork in
Jokes I told my mum I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. She said, “Well, you can’t put it down, can you?” My family is so traditional. We still believe in the ancient art of “knock before entering.” I asked my brother if he could help me with maths. He said, “I can’t count
