Jokes The elderly parish priest had just turned seventy-five and was enjoying his retirement and his one great passion which was fishing. He was sitting is his boat on the lake when he heard a voice cry, “Pick me up: pick me up!” Looking around he couldn’t see anyone. He thought he was […]
Jokes At the reception following the wedding of a young couple, the Master of Ceremonies polled the guests to see who had been married the longest. To loud applause one couple announced they had been married for sixty years. The MC said, “What advice would you pass on to the newlyweds?” “The woman said, “The
This weekend Pope Francis is hosting children from around the world for the first ever World Children’s Day. To celebrate the occasion, here are some kids’ jokes. A warning: some are rather corny!
You can’t beat a silly Dad joke …
When does a joke become a ‘Dad joke’? When it becomes apparent.
A wife says to her husband, “I bought you a beautiful surprise today.”
The husband replies, “That’s great. When can I see it?”
She says, “Wait a minute, and I’ll put it on.”
Florence was a conceited woman who was aware of her faults. One day after Mass she was talking to her parish priest and said, “Father, this morning I spent almost an hour looking into the bedroom mirror admiring my beauty. Is that cause for concern? Should I go to confession?”
“Actually, no,” the priest replied after thinking for a moment. “You only have to confess sins, not errors in judgement.”
After a long and successful career as a small business owner, a man decides he wants to devote the rest of his life to God, so he joins a seminary and studies to be a priest. A few years later after his ordination he is assigned to a parish. One Saturday afternoon he was about to hear confessions when he met an old friend from his former life.
Following Mass one Sunday morning, a thoughtless parishioner tossed a cigarette butt into the garden. Spotting the smouldering bush, the parish priest pulled out his mobile phone and called the fire department.
A couple in a small town want to have children but the wife is having trouble falling pregnant, so they go to see their local parish priest. The priest tells them their timing is spot on as his archbishop has ordered him to Rome for 10 years, and he’s leaving tomorrow.
Jokes A priest, a deacon and the parish secretary take a shortcut through a vacant lot on their way to a meeting to discuss the upcoming Easter services when they come across an old oil lamp. The priest picks it up and rubs it with his handkerchief. To their amazement, a genie appears in a